Republic of Athens

Roommate issues require patience, creative thinking

Dear Trevor: So, this is my first year at college. Before I moved down here, I had chatted a little over Facebook with my roommate-to-be. She seemed a little weird, but pretty cool overall. But now we’ve got some major issues, and I’m not sure what to do. It started with disagreements about little things, like not leaving my shoes on her side of our dorm. Then I walked in on her cussing out my shoes (no kidding!), which were barely touching the half-way point across our floor.

I just let it go, and pretended not to notice. Well, lately she’s been waiting until I fall asleep to come into the room and light various parts of her own body on fire! So, I get to wake up to the terrifying sounds of her screaming. When I confront her about it, she just leaves and usually doesn’t come back for a couple of days. Also, I know she’s been eating my cereals and things, little bits at a time. Plus I heard she’s into vegetarianism or libertarianism or one of those kinds of things. What should I do?

- Kaiyteleinne, North Olmstead

Dear Kaiyteleinne: I had a really similar situation during my first year in college. In the case of my roommate, he not only exhibited noisy self-destructive behaviors, but took to hiding various pieces of roadkill in my bed clothes and dresser drawers. He even stuck a bloody death threat, held in place by a hunting knife, to my pillow.

But the last straw was when he ate three of my Snickers “fun size” bars without asking. I almost hit the roof!

As it turned out, we just needed to open the lines of communication. We contacted our university’s mediation services, and got to work on embracing our differences. My roommate never did admit to the carcass stunts, but we did learn a lot about each other (and how to label our food items)! Try to view the challenges presented by your roommate as great opportunities to expand your own horizons — and maybe you’ll make a new friend in the process.

Dear Trevor: We’ve got this new housemate who likes to drink way too much. During a recent party, he urinated into my laptop. I can’t straight-up prove that he did it, but I know he’s the only one around who would do that. Anyway, now the keys stick all the time. Plus, just knowing the unit was urinated on, you know? When I asked him about it, he said he didn’t remember doing it. But that doesn’t mean I should have to just accept a urinated-on laptop, does it?

- Mike, Cincinnati

Dear Mike: I actually had a very similar situation once in a shared living space during college. To make matters worse, the computer-urinator culprit was my girlfriend. I suspect it was during one of her drunken romps with my best friend. We talked it out non-confrontationally, and came to an agreement that she wouldn’t do that again. Your best friend in this case, Mike, is COMMUNICATION (and a little sanitizer)!

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