Republic of Athens

New roommate lacks basic social skills

Dear Trevor: I could use your advice on how to deal with my new housemate, whom I’ll call “Bud.” Bud moved in just recently after my last housemate, “Mike,” moved out quickly and unexpectedly. To put it bluntly, Bud can be a bit surly.

He stays in his room pretty much all the time, except when he goes out at night. He rarely spends time in the common areas of the house, and all of his food and drinks are stacked neatly on one side of the fridge –  I guess he doesn’t want to share. In the 72 hours since he’s moved in, he’s refused my multiple invitations for a game of checkers, or my offers of a cold soda, or even a ham-salad sandwich.

Last night, when he came home, it was clear he’d been out partying. He looked a little “hungover,” if you know what I mean. Shortly after he came home, he got sick in the bathroom. I went in and offered to help clean up, but he just said, “Get the (expletive) out of here.” I’m disappointed — I was really hoping Bud and I could be pals.

– Bummed on North College Street

Dear Bummed: Your housemate reminds me a lot of one I had briefly during my sophomore year. I went through some of the same frustrations with him. For being such a cool guy, he sure did keep to himself a lot.

No amount of “Let’s go outside and toss around the football” could pull him away from his video games, smut mags, and various other vices. My choices were to adjust by accepting him (since you can’t change another person without his or her willing participation in that change) or find a new environment more suited to my own interests. As it turned out, though, my “Bud” was an undercover cop whose true identity we ‘d learn only after ”Bud” was badly injured while biking just a little too close to cougar country!

Dear Trevor: My roommate and I are about to host our first off-campus party. We’ve pared down the guest list to over-21s, reserved a few kegs and sent the invitations. Any tips for pulling off a successful (and legal) bash?

– Ashleighee and Barbara

Dear A and B: Hey, ladies! Sounds like a good time. Hmm… A successful and legal bash. Well, it might be smart to keep a few fake I.D.s (with generic-enough-looking pictures) on hand in advance. That way, in the event that some under-agers “sneak through the cracks” and the cops happen to pay a visit, you could present a few examples of your handiwork, and make like you had just seized them from the perpetrators yourself.

You could be all, “I can’t believe these people just lied to me! Thanks so much for your time and help, officer.” Just be sure not to oversell your lines, and do not smirk. Also, it’s never too early to start practicing your best “betrayed and genuinely disappointed” face. ; ) You could probably even incorporate it into some kind of drinking game, or corn hole or something. May the best “disappointed” face win!

It may not be cool to rat out illegal revelers, but it sure beats being the one that Mom, Dad, and Aunt Jane get to read about online in the Athens police blotter.  Oh yeah, and steer clear of the hard drugs!

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