Republic of Athens

‘Downtown’ mantis

So, I recently discovered that someone took the time to paint on an Athens exit sign quotation marks around the word “downtown.” Seized by the ambiguity of the message, I set off to get my camera. (I know, I know. Always keep it with you, just in case.) But this seemed a subtle enough form of graffiti that I could at least feel assured that it wasn’t going anywhere any time soon.

Not wanting to waste another trip back to the sign, I opted to hike it back on foot, camera in tow. With every step, more burning questions — were the quotation marks intended to imply “not really downtown,” as in “this exit actually leads to somewhere other than downtown”? Or was it a nod to the local tradition of referring to inner Athens as “uptown,” rather than “downtown”? Or maybe a sarcastic take on the notion that we should even need such terms for designating different portions of such a small city?

It just seemed too meticulous and too deliberate to be the result of a random act of signage customization. But I had to know. And what better way than to publicly post a photo for public consumption, discussion, and understanding?

As I closed in on the sign, I discovered something astonishing. Someone had already dutifully removed the quotation marks from the sign! I chose to photograph the cleaned-up sign anyway, in hopes of shedding some much-needed light on this issue.

Feeling defeated, I walked back down the highway ramp, only to stumble directly into the path of this mantis! I figured I might at well at least get a cool insect picture. As I knelt down, I found myself face-to-face with a rather menacing creature, perhaps interpreting my encroaching curiosity as aggression. The mantis’ fierce, knowing eyes glared at their own reflection, then at the fleshy, bipedal, alien coward behind the camera.

I was instantly reminded of the otherwise docile mantis’ substantial prowess, heralded as the model and namesake for an ancient Chinese fighting system. As she advanced vigorously toward my hand, I had to employ a primal defense mechanism of my own, a little bit of panic and a whole lot of speed. In an effort to outwit the mantis, I fled, running in a zig-zag formation. Unscathed, I did manage to come away with this close-up:

Evidently, in the city’s major crackdown on graffiti, unwarranted punctuation on official signs is a major no-no (and might even be removed before the paint dries). I decided to set out to check on the status of some other unsanctioned paintings around town. It would appear that the city is cool with these long-standing dandies:

- This report was submitted to REPUBLICOFATHENS.COM on the condition of anonymity. The contributor chose not to go public with his now-serious fear of the praying mantis.